When I was in elementary school, I learned this song. It's called coffee cannon, and it was my first ever vocal audition. I killed it, by the way.
"Coffee is not for me. It's a drink some people wake up with. That it makes them nervous is no myth. Slaves to a coffee cup, they can't give coffee up."
I do have doctor's and intended parents' permission to continue to self caffeinate (so no hate mail, please) but I do try to temper my habit when expecting. But it seems I've been asking the wrong people for permission in this pregnancy. Because apparently the cubs are 100% anti coffee.
I've been increasingly sick the last two weeks or so. I've now puked three times... a number that comes close to matching the amount of vomiting I did in my prior pregnancies... combined. Every time coffee has been a factor. I've either just had it or smelled it. I've learned my lesson. Avoid coffee at all costs.
This lesson has developed into a full fledged case of Tourrette's Syndrome.
Allow me to explain.
There I was just enjoying a delicious warm, cinnamon rich bread pudding topped with sweet caramel goodness. It was a perfect sweet that cried out for a bitter balance to complete the palate. So, at a table inside a well packed restaurant, I said,
"This is delicious. I think I'll get a cup of coffeeNNOOOO!"
Every head within 5 tables snapped to the crazy woman at table 6. My husband jumped.
And this wasn't the last time this would happen in the next 24 hours.
Just 12 hours later I awoke at a beautiful Equine farm bed and breakfast; my birthday gift. I walked out of our tack house accommodation to the front porch where I was greeted with a brisk breeze and the sweet aroma of morning dew. Out loud I said,
"All I need to make this perfect is a cup of coffNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO"
I may or may not have startled a nearby rabbit.
Sigh. Guess I'll go make myself a nice, warm cup of no, thank you.