Friday, February 21, 2014

I'm Going To Eat My Placenta

T&M are giving me the placenta that is currently keeping their child alive. 

And I'm going to eat it. 


You're probably thinking:
1- Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2-Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?????
3- Didn't Tom Cruise do that? 
4- How?
5- Does this make Mandy a cannibal? 
6-How much does THAT cost?

Patience friends, just as Clarissa did in the 1990's,  I'm going to explain it all.



#1- EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Yes, I feel it too. I don't blame you at all for feeling that way. Truth is, I feel it too. Believe me, I'm not looking forward to this the way I look forward to a great big bloody rare steak. Although, I will be consuming at least part of this vital HUMAN ORGAN bloody and very rare. More on that later. For now, know you're not alone. This is a foreign idea and you're allowed to join me in being kind of grossed out by it.

#2- WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY would you do that?
Also a reaction I had every in the thought forming process of this venture. After listening to to other surrogates rave about the benefits of placenta consumption (most commonly in pill form) I decided to do my own research on the subject. Here's what I found.

While no scientific evidence yet exists,  users often report widespread benefits including:
Increased energy

  • Quicker weight loss
  • Quicker recovery from delivery- specifically in the instance of C-Section deliveries
  • Better mood
  • Fewer instances of "baby blues" or post pardum depression
  • Better ability to sleep
  • Quicker stoppage of postpartum bleeding 
  • Milk comes in much more quickly. 


As a surrogate, I won't get the benefit of endorphins created by skin to skin contact with a newborn, or the additional good juju constantly created by latch on nursing.  For those reasons most specifically, I decided that as much as it (still kind of) grosses me out, this was something I couldn't afford to not try.

Let's face it folks, surrogacy isn't natural. If it were, it wouln't take so many doctors and needles to make it happen. To assume my emotions can handle my body doing something that would be physically impossible without science, is just ignorant. I'm not superwoman. While I feel fairly certain I'll be just fine emotionally after the birth, to not arm myself for success in every way possible just seems foolish to me.

Here is a link to more information and research on palcenta encapsulation benefits.

#3- Didn't Tom Cruise do that? 
Apparently it depends on which interview you read. In some he boasts of it, in others he claims it was just a statement made in mockery. While I don't think it really matters who has and has not done this, here is a list of celebs who admit to eating their placenta (and liking it)
1-Kim Kardashian
2- January Jones
3- Alicia Silverstone
4- Mayim Bialik
5- Twins Tia &Tamara Lowrey
I also know plenty of real world mothers who have done this within the surrogacy community.

#4- How???
OK, here comes the meat and potatoes (hehehe) of this discussion. How does one consume an organ created by pregnancy and carried within the body for 9 months? Or, perhaps more interestingly, how does MANDY intend to consume her own organ?

Turns out there are a variety of ways to consume one's self. Some were worth considering, some wern't... at least not for me.

Placenta Pills, Not So Scary
Some people are said to fry them up in a pan with a little oil and a lot of garlic. Liver and Onions, anyone? This one is not for me and was thrown out the window immediately. Another option I threw out was to use the organ to create a body cream which I would then slather on my stretch marks. Not for me either.

Perhaps the least unsettling way to consume your own organs is in a pill. I will be doing this. I have a specialist who will come to the hospital to collect the organ as soon after birth as possible in order to dehydrate it, grind it up, put it into pill capsules and deliver back to me. In this form, it's really no more than a new type of vitamin. And considering all the other meds I've put into my body during this process... what's one more?

OK, Now hold onto your pants. 
I will also be consuming at least a portion of my placenta raw, and within hours of delivering it from my body. 

Do you need a pail? I kind of did when the idea was first presented to me.

So why am I going ahead with this and allowing a woman to slice and dice my placenta in my hospital recovery room? Here's the fact folks; I'VE COMMITTED TO CONSUMING A HUMAN PLACENTA. If we're going that far, we might as well do it in a manner that will deliver the highest level of benefit for my body. The hormone and nutrient levels are highest in the raw form. So if I'm doing this, I'm DOING this. That means our placenta chef will bring a blender to the hospital and mix approx. 1 oz raw placenta with 15 oz. berries and other smoothie ingredients to make a healthy momma placenta smoothie. Mmmmmm.

#5- Does This Make Mandy A Cannibal? 
According to Merrium Webster, Cannibalism is defined as:    
1: the usually ritualistic eating of human flesh by a human being
2:  the eating of the flesh of an animal by another animal of the same kind


And flesh is defined as:
the soft parts of the body of an animal or person; the skin of a person
So, by those standards, the answer would be...maybe? I'm not eating any skin, but the defining of "soft parts" is ambiguous and leaves room for speculation.

How do I feel about it though? Am I any better than Jeffery Dommer? I think I am.

I am not consuming human parts for enjoyment or satisfaction. In fact I remain kind of grossed out by it. I will not be doing this on a regular basis nor do I plan to seek it out for an purpose other than medicinal. I am looking at this as a post natal multi vitamin. I do not consider myself a cannibal.

#6- How much does this COST? 
If you're a follower of this blog, you know I don't talk numbers. Really at all. I think doing so cheapens what I'm doing by monetizing it. So I'm not going to talk about what this costs here either. I do recognize that there is an interest in this, and I also believe in full disclosure. So, if you're REALLY interested, follow this link to Puget Sound Placenta's pricing page. The cost is fully disclosed. You could also learn a lot more about this process there.

So, there you have it. I've committed to eat my own placenta. Details to follow once bubs is here.

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