Sunday, March 31, 2013

A Life Less Pretty

Home from Palm Springs, and so happy it is Easter. Because it means so many things to me. I love Easter  And this year, Easter marks the end of a particularly painful Lenten season.

I gave up make up for Lent this year, and it has been a journey. The point was to find beauty in myself. The point was to appreciate the beauty that God- not man- gave me. I love make up. This was not an easy sacrifice for me. And if we're being honest, I am so glad it is over.

At the start I found myself staying home because I was embarrassed to go out without my mask. That was unreasonable and couldn't last for 40 days and 40 nights. Eventually I had to give in and go out. I felt like people were staring at me in unnatural ways. I even felt like my self confidence was impacted greatly. It was out and out uncomfortable.

But over the weeks something changed in me. It became second nature to get up, brush my hair and go. No more wasted time on make up. I liked like simplicity of it. And yes, eventually I came to see myself as beautiful on my own. I no longer think I NEED make up. But, I still like it a lot.

I also thought that my skin would turn out beautifully clear because of the fast. And in the end, it has. But there was an adjustment period around 14 days or so that lead to the worst acme of my life. Add that to my wavering self esteem and ugh.

Anyway, it was a sacrifice worth doing. I am glad I did it. But I am really glad it is over.

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